Class Topics

WAX ON, WAX OFF

Hot wax play can really be ‘hot play’! Learn the kinds of wax to play with and the kinds of wax to avoid. You can incorporate wax into your play from just a couple of drops from a candle to turning your entire scene into a wax play scenario. You can completely encase someone in wax or just encase some of their body parts. Learn about the heat of the wax and how you can regulate that heat and the different ways of application. Learn how to creatively put wax on and how to creatively take wax off. This is a hands-on class so anyone who would like to experience the feel of hot wax will be able to do so.

CANING: FROM SENSUOUS TO SADISTIC

Many people think of caning and think that it is only for seriously heavy players but caning can also be light and playful. Caning, unlike spanking or paddling gives a two-fold sensation. You first feel the strike and moments later, it radiates throughout you. Caning can be very sensuously applied or you can sadistically cane someone. If you strike over and over without allowing that permeating feeling, it can be quite intense and literally take your breath away. Some subs are afraid to be caned because they have only seen the intense caning and have never seen or felt caning in a way that can be teasing and titillating. We will explore caning from one spectrum to the other and even some in between. Hopefully after this class, you will see caning in a whole new light.

BURN BABY BURN: THE ART OF FIREPLAY

We were all taught as children to Never play with fire and told how dangerous that it can be. If you have respect for what fire can do, you can learn how to play with fire safely and to learn all the safeguards and precautions you should take. Fire play is not only very visual but can be quite a mind game when the person sees their self “on fire” (they really are not but it appears that way). The subject feels the warmth on their body as they see the flames dance on their skin. This is a hands on class and if you choose to, you may experience fire play so that you know what it is like.

GOOD TO THE LAST DROP: A LASTING RELATIONSHIP

In this day and age of disposable relationships, how do we make our BDSM relationships last? When you look at most D/s relationships, few make it past the honeymoon phase and it is rare to see them past five or so years. This class will talk about the things that are found in lasting D/s relationships and the things to look out for and avoid. I have firsthand experience in long relationships, currently in three, one for 17 years, one for 11 years and one for almost 8 years. I also had a slave that had been with me for over 10 years and it ended amiably. I’ve also been in very short-term D/s relationships…some by choice but some because of my lack of knowledge that was needed at the time to sustain them. This class will not only teach you the tools to sustain long term relationships but help you to know what to do when the time comes for one to end.

TABOOS: EXPLORING THE POLITICALLY INCORRECT

We have a saying in this lifestyle, “Never say NEVER!” and if you remain in this lifestyle long enough, you may try many things that you thought that you never would. For many, one of the things that we enjoy is pushing the boundaries and exploring places that we would never want to go in the ‘real world’. We reach into ourselves, many times accessing our darker side and when we let that untamed side out; we find out much about who we are and those around us. Playing with “forbidden fruit” as my dear friend calls it, can be enlightening, enticing, entertaining and surprisingly enjoyable. It can also be daring, debilitating, deadly and dangerously detrimental if you’re not careful and understand what you are doing. Tapping into some of those taboos depends a lot on your upbringing and your life experiences. This is very much a ‘stay in the moment’ type play and may be quite difficult for some to watch as well as quite surprising to those that think they will be repulsed and instead are excited and fascinated. Come and delve into the realm of the things that make some squeamish and explore this type of play with me. THE

HEALTHY DOMINANT AND HEALTHY SUBMISSIVE

This class is about much more than self-esteem. It is about learning some of the characteristics required to have and maintain a healthy D/s relationship. There are many people who come into this lifestyle for all the wrong reasons and think that BDSM will be a quick fix. Although this lifestyle can be therapeutic, it is not a substitute for therapy. This class will talk about the characteristics that both a healthy Dominant and healthy submissive should possess.

HOW TO END A BDSM RELATIONSHIP AMIABLY

This class discusses the different phases that one goes through when a D/s relationship ends. It is not so much about placing blame, but rather what to do when your desires, wants and needs drift apart. What happens if you have outgrown your partner? How do we recognize what is happening and what do we do about it? How do we deal with the grief that accompanies the death of the relationship. We will discuss the responsibilities of the Dominant as well as those of the submissive/slave. This is a class that will help those entering into a relationship and strengthen those that are already in one.

MIND CONTROL

Control the mind and you control the body. Learn that the best sex organ that we have is our mind and what a man thinks is what he becomes. Understand that playing inside someone’s head can be fun and exciting but it comes with great responsibilities and if done incorrectly, it can come with great consequence. If you are going to walk around in someone’s head; you had better learn to do it safely and make sure that when you have finished, their brain is not turned into mush. This class will help you to become the master of the mind fuck.

D/S RELATIONSHIP VS. VANILLA RELATIONSHIP

This class discusses D/s relationships and how we go into them still exercising many of our vanilla teachings. Many of our D/s concepts such as poly or FemDom relationships are contrary to the way many of us were raised and what we were taught. This conflict of what we want vs. what we have been taught to believe may become a hindrance if we are not aware of these differences. Understand that we have to realize that our vanilla thoughts may sometimes be in complete opposition to what we are trying to achieve in our D/s relationships. Learning to recognize those differences will help you to change and/or modify your way of thinking so that your thoughts and desires are in sync thereby helping to achieve a more cohesive relationship.

DOMINEERING VS. DOMINANT

It takes more than being a control freak to be a good Dominant. Learn what it means to be a Dominant and when a person is just domineering. This class will help Dominants understand themselves better. The class will also help a submissive learn to recognize a true Dominant from someone who is domineering. Learning these differences, although they may sometimes appear subtle, will help you to realize the relationship that you desire or the relationship that you may be in.

WHEN THE TEACHER BECOMES THE STUDENT

What do you do when you acquire a submissive that has much more experience in the lifestyle than you do? Is there a way to learn from them and still keep them from topping from the bottom? We will discuss all of the dynamics when the teacher becomes the student and how that translates in the relationship. We will discuss the steps and precautions to take from the Dominant as well as the submissive side. We will discuss some of the pitfalls that many new Dominants fall into. If you are presently in a relationship like this one or have ever been in one, you will want to attend this class.

RACE PLAY

Even the mention of Race Play is opening up a proverbial can of worms. Race is a touchy subject at best and using it in a form of BDSM play is unimaginable for some. I have to admit that I too, used to feel that way until I met a submissive who helped me to better understand and changed my point of view. This was not an easy task since being a therapist I am an advocate for healing through self-exploration and at the time I could not understand that this could be a positive experience by any means. I was wrong and once again (as has happened before) I was amazed in what I learned through the experience. This class will discuss why this type of play is so difficult for many and why it is such a turn on for some. We will discuss the perceptions and misconceptions concerning this very controversial type of play.

CONTROL: WHAT IT IS AND WHAT IT IS NOT!

Control. It is the basis of the D/s relationship. We will discuss what control really is and what it means to be in control. We will discuss the myths and fallacies about control. Learn the difference between being in control and learning to control. As a Dominant, how does control work for you? As a submissive, are there boundaries in giving up control and if so, where are they? Does a control freak really make a good Dominant? Does absolute power truly corrupt absolutely? What happens if you lose control? Learning what control is and what it is not will help you to maintain control of your relationship.

EROTIC HYPNOSIS: A GUIDE TO SEXUAL HEALING

All hypnosis is self-hypnosis. Learn what hypnosis is and how it can be used. This workshop will teach you about the misconceptions of hypnosis and show you how you can use it to change habits, create healing and experience growth. We all have issues concerning sex whether from negative beliefs, family or religion, etc. Understand that your mind is your most powerful sex organ and you can use it to take control of your life. Use hypnosis to achieve a healthy sex life. By learning to heal ourselves, we will ultimately experience greater pleasure with our partners and a greater peace and happiness within us.

THE ART OF SPANKING

Yes, there is more to spanking than just hitting someone. Just ask any true spanking enthusiast. For many of us, spanking was the first form of discipline we received as children. Learn different techniques of spanking and when they should be used. Learn the difference between erotic spankings and discipline spankings. We will not only discuss the spanking itself but the mindset behind many of them. Learn that the setting and surroundings can play a big part in the success of a good spanking. If spanking is your fetish, then this workshop will help you make the most out of them whether you are the spanker or the spankee.

AGE PLAY: EMBRACING YOUR “LITTLE”

In this workshop learn what age play is and the many different ways that people use it. For some it is combined with gender play. For some it is a highly emotional and sometimes volatile place to go but for some it is very healing. Learn how to become an effective Mommy or Daddy and how to care for your “little” responsibly. The parameters for “littles” are as vast as the ages that these ‘adult children’ become. When these adults regress to children; it is not a game for many of them. Understanding the mindset and these differences will help in preventing any emotional damage. Learn what to do in case you happen to stumble into one of those emotional holes during your play and learn about the aftercare involved. If you recognize and are aware of the psychological pitfalls that are associated with this type of play, you will find that age play can be mutually satisfying for both the top and bottom involved.

FOR THE FOOT LOVER

This is a hands-on workshop for Dominants and submissives that have a foot fetish. Regardless of whether you have ever been a foot slave or have just dreamed of being one, this workshop will help you to better achieve this. You will learn the many ways to care for the feet and learn how to make yourself more attractive to a Dominant looking for a foot slave. Learn the difference between foot care and foot worship. There are many different techniques that can be used for both and different tools that can be used.

ROLE PLAYING AND BDSM

Many of us that enjoy BDSM first had a realization of that enjoyment through role playing. We may not have been role playing ourselves but as we watched a show or cartoon or read a particular book, we transposed ourselves into the character that fit our orientation. The submissive always identified with the victim, perhaps that damsel in distress and the Dominant usually played the part of the villain or perhaps the heroine, that authority figure who was in control. In any case we played the parts if only in our minds and thus we enjoyed those experiences. As adolescents we enjoyed role playing and cowboys/cowgirls and Indians, doctor/nurse and patient, etc. became fun because we could tie up or be tied, examine or be examined and for hours we fulfilled our roles through fantasy. As adults, we find that taking on different roles for even a few hours relieves us from the stress and responsibility of every day life. Years ago Dungeons and Dragons became the craze because it gave you the ability to transform into someone else and live out fantasies and create alternate realities. Role playing is especially great for a newcomer who may be too intimidated to serve a Mistress but can be controlled by a nanny or given orders by a police officer. This workshop will teach you how to make the most out of your role playing scenes and what to do if one goes wrong. You will learn the things that you should be aware of and things to look out for. This workshop will take your role playing to a whole new level.

MUMMIFICATION

Mummification is a special type of bondage that encases the person making them feel totally enclosed, safe and vulnerable. Learn some of the many things that you can use to mummify someone and learn safety tips. We will discuss the psychological aspects that accompany the physical ones. If you enjoy bondage, this class will help you to take it to another level.

IS WHAT I SAID, WHAT YOU HEARD? LEARNING TO COMMUNICATE EFFECTIVELY

This class is about learning more effective communication styles. We always talk about communication but not about EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION. The main purpose for this class is to teach the submissive greater listening skills and how to communicate better with one another effectively. The demonstration scene is a series of commands and orders by the Dominant and followed to the letter by the submissive. The lesson that is learned is how the submissive interprets the orders and also how well the Dominant communicates exactly what and how they want. It is quite an eye opening experience to witness how different your communication styles may be. In learning these differences, you will learn how to communicate with one another more effectively and realize that the submissive that you thought was just a SAM, may not be at all. This scene is beneficial for anyone who would like to strengthen their communication skills, whether Dominant or submissive.

INTERROGATION AND/OR RESISTANCE PLAY

This type of play is not for everyone and definitely not for the faint at heart. Interrogation usually includes resistance play but resistance play may not necessarily include interrogation. Resistance play is quite physical and usually the sub/slave or bottom is resisting whatever the top is requesting or demanding. This type of play may sometimes have face slapping, kicking, biting and other forms of fighting and can appear to be quite extreme to the viewer. The goal in this scenario is to be overpowered and ‘forced’ to do whatever is negotiated. Understand that detailed negotiations should take place before a scene like this is done. Limits especially should be discussed, especially hard limits. This is also true in interrogation scenes since they usually not only are quite physical but an element of mental and psychological terror are added as well. If you have not set limits and discussed the ‘what if’ scenarios, you may step into a black hole and do some psychological damage. Even Dominants have limits and may enjoy this type ofa scene but may have a problem with face slapping, etc. Learn about these types of play, the pros and the cons and what to do if one of them goes array.

BODY PUNCHING

Body punching is an awesome scene for the players and an intense scene to watch. Some people cannot watch this type of scene because for them it mimics too much like ‘abuse.’ However for the negotiated parties, it can be lots of fun and very rewarding. Body punching includes many types of physical contact including open hand slapping, punching with hands or gloves and even kicking. I knew a women who would cum just by being kicked in her behind. Learn the areas to avoid and how to play this scene with safety and awareness.

THE B.I.T.C.H. IS IN! (FEMALE DOMINANTS ONLY) FEMALE DOMINANCE: FOR THE NEW AND THE OLD! RESPONSIBILITIES IN SERVING A FEMDOMME (SUBMISSIVES ONLY) NOTE: THE FIRST CLASS IS FOR FEMDOMMES AND THOSE THAT IDENTIFY AS SUCH. HOWEVER, MY SUBMISSIVE WILL TAKE THE SUBS IN A DIFFERENT ROOM FOR THEIR OWN CLASS. DESCRIPTION OF THAT CLASS IS ALSO BELOW.

Women play many different roles in this lifestyle. There are female Masters, Mistress’, Mommies, Daddy’s, etc.EveryFemDomme is a woman but every woman is not a FemDomme. I am not only a Female Dominant but I identify as a (FemDomme, FemDom). Although I do not believe in Female Supremacy, I do believe in FEMALE EMPOWERMENT. This is a round table discussion to share our experiences, our thoughts and yes, even our shortcomings so that the newcomers can hopefully learn from them. We will talk about how to become empowered women and we will discuss what it is to be a female in a male dominated society. We will discuss the qualities of a Female Dominant and how some women give away their power. We will talk about the similarities as well as the differences in dominating a male and/or female submissive. Ladies, those of you who are new to this lifestyle, please come, bring your questions and share your views. For all of the ‘seasoned’ women who have much wisdom and life experience, please come and share it. This is a class that I wish I could have attended when I began, so it is near and dear to my heart. You will walk away from this class with a sense of empowerment, encouragement and female camaraderie. This class will discuss the FemDomme phenomenon and an understanding that a B.I.T.C.H. is BEING IN TOTAL CONTROL OF HIM!! All who identify as a Female Dominant are welcome.

THE RESPONSIBILITIES OF SERVING A FEMDOMME

My slave will be the mediator for this class and will share with you her experiences in serving a Diva. This class will discuss the qualities needed to serve a FemDomme. As stated above, all women are not FemDommes and the qualities needed to serve one are quite different from serving a Master or a Daddy. The class will also be a roundtable discussion and will discuss the skills that are needed and the differences between serving a Female Dominant from some of the other types of Dominants. Male and female slaves, submissives and bottoms please come and share your feelings and experiences. If you are new to this lifestyle, you will truly benefit from this.

GENDER FUCKING: OR WHAT SEX ARE YOU ANYWAY?

This workshop talks about what your biological gender is and how that may differ in what gender you play. There are women who play in male gender space, men who play in female gender space and a lot in between. We all have male and female makeup and this class explores areas of yourselves that you may rarely if ever access. We will discuss the mental and emotional reasons and reactions to gender fucking. This is not a class about your sexual identity as much as it is about how you identify during your play. My male persona, Lord D is many things that Lady D is not. Lady D may be the loving, nurturing mother like lady but Lord D is harsh, cruel, lacks empathy and most of the time is just a son of a bitch!! This is a great class for those who would like to learn about and possibly explore other sides of their gender. You may find out that there is much more to yourself than meets the eye.

HUMILIATION PLAY

This workshop will discuss the definition of humiliation. Some have called this type of play to be ‘edge play’ but is it and if so, why is it? For those of us that use humiliation, do we use it in real punishment or is it just play or can it be both? We will discuss how do you determine what is humiliation and is it different than embarrassment? How do you recognize it and how can you use it to your advantage? We will also discuss what are some of the pitfalls of this type of play. When done effectively, humiliation play can be both fun and exciting.

LEARNING TO PLAY WITH THE DISABLED

I have been blessed with helping to raise a ‘special needs’ granddaughter and have had the pleasure and privilege to play with many ‘special needs’ persons. I prefer to use that term because what I have come to realize is that these people were far from disabled, although all of them required special things and I had to learn those needs in order for our play to be effective and mutually satisfying. Whether the person is blind, or deaf, or whether they have physical limitations or diseases that you must be aware of, you must learn about what is required and those special needs to be able to play with the individual. For many, the fear of not knowing what to do or hurting someone (not in a good sense) keeps many people paralyzed with fear. However, if you learn about the person, the illness, the disability and their special needs, you can play with them safely and with the same kind of risk as any other person. What you gain from this type of play (besides the comfort level that comes with the experience) is invaluable knowledge about a disease or a culture of people you may otherwise have never been exposed to. This is a valuable class for those who would like to experience this type of play.

CONSENSUAL NON-CONSENT! NO BOUNDARIES, NO LIMITS, NO SAFE WORDS AND NO VETO POWER. OH MY!!!!!!

Consensual/Non-consent refers to the type of agreement made based on Dominance and submission between the Dominant and submissive party, stipulating that the submissive has consented to the Dominant's decisions and puts him/herself in the care of the Dominant. The submissive parties in these types of situations typically relinquish personal freedoms and rights to the Dominant's discretion/will. During what might seem to be a ruthless forced control scene, sensitivity to the delicate balance between the demands of the fantasy scenario and the actual mental/physical state of the willingly helpless victim is essential. It is necessary for the Controller of such a scene to sustain the energy and atmosphere. It is often necessary to improvise while following a predetermined plan. One must anticipate needs while monitoring change in emotional climate. It can be a real bear deciding whether to push the scene ahead or ease up temporarily…much like walking a tightrope. This class will keep you on the edge of your seat.

THE SPIRITUAL SIDE OF BDSM

Most of us entered into this lifestyle through Hedonism. The things that we fantasized about made us hot and wet and we couldn’t wait to try them. We indulged in activities that for many led to mind-blowing kinky sex. During our self exploration journey, some of us began to realize that there was more. Our experiences surpassed just the physical and at times reached to our very soul. This class explores the acknowledgement that there can be a spiritual aspect to what it is that we do.

DIVERSITY: THE BDSM RAINBOW COALITION

This is a roundtable discussion with class participation discussing the challenges facing minorities in the lifestyle. How if at all does our traditions, superstitions and perceptions play a role? We will discuss why there is such a lack of ethnic diversity in the lifestyle and seek solutions for this. We will discuss why there seems to be so few minorities at public events and what can be done to encourage minorities of all races to come out and participate more in activities. This class welcomes not only minorities but all who desire to share their thoughts, experiences and possible solutions in this roundtable.

RITUALS: HOW THEY CAN ENHANCE YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Rituals are used for many reasons. In this class we will discuss the reasons that they are used in BDSM. We will give examples of different rituals and how they are used. Adding rituals to your relationship will help keep both participants aware of the D/s in the relationship. I will demonstrate the many rituals that I use and ask others to share theirs. Rituals are especially useful in new D/s relationships to help maintain the correct mindset for the submissive as well as the Dominant. This class will help you to evolve to a new level in your D/s relationship.

WHAT COLOR OF CRAZY ARE YOU? MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL HEALING!

We all have issues that may block our path to self-fulfillment.  Many of our core beliefs were formed in childhood and have been carried with us into our daily lives.  I call these issues that prevent us from moving forward “our color of crazy.”  We need to deal with these issues so that we can engage with one another in a healthy manner.  If you are a leader, this is especially essential since the body can only be as healthy as the head is. We will discuss the different colors of crazy and things that are needed to get healing from them.  Through self-analysis and reflection; we can identify our deficiencies and what work is needed to become mentally and emotionally healthy so we can lead from a place of strength and power.

FUN WITH DICK, NOT JANE - THE SENSUAL ART OF CBT

CBT has gotten a bad rap.  CBT stands for Cock and Ball Torture so many men hear the words CBT and cringe.  They are not into genital pain and do not want severe pain so they are afraid to go there.  However, CBT can also stand for Cock and Ball Teasing, Tantalizing, Titillating (insert a sensual T word).  You don’t have to pierce or nail your cock to a board or be into ball kicking to enjoy CBT.  It can be completely sensual and tactile play.  The penis has many nerve endings and you can create mind blowing experiences by over loading the senses.  Also what your mind believes, your body responds to so you can evoke responses that you wouldn’t think could be done.  Whether circumcised or not, learn the art of sensual intensity through CBT.

MENTAL ILLNESS - IT'S NOT A DIRTY WORD

Mental Illness is one of those elephants in the room that you try to ignore.  We go along pretending that it doesn’t exist and then act surprised when disaster strikes.  We have put such a negative stigma on mental illness that people in the community are afraid to disclose when they have it or are walking around untreated because they are afraid to be diagnosed with it.  This class is going to discuss mental illness, what it is, how it affects our relationships and our community. We will talk about ways to dispel the stigma and what things that we can do to help and understand this illness.  People are hurting and dying because we keep ignoring this elephant. We have got to change that so let’s talk about it.

REALITY BITES - WHEN KINK TURNS SILVER

This is a class about recognizing and meeting the needs of elders and the elderly in our community. We will discuss the decline of elder participation and how we are losing generations of experiences and stories. What can we do to improve that in our community? We will discuss the realities of being a senior and how that effects the community as a whole. The class will help enhance membership in your organizations with those in our community that bring knowledge and wisdom with them. What can we do to bring them back so that your groups can benefit from those who have gone before us.…before they are gone.